“If you’re around my age or maybe slightly older, quicksand was a major concern. When I was, say, 5 or 6 years old, I think I would have listed quicksand as one of the chief causes of death for explorers, Tarzan’s entourage, and even railroad crews in the Old West. It came up in movies and TV shows all the time. Gilligan’s Island, Abbott and Costello, Jonny Quest and so many others had to contend with it. My friends and I would regularly discuss how to survive quicksand and run drills pretending that the living room floor was quicksand (when it wasn’t lava, duh).
“It turns out it’s not even really a thing. I mean it exists, but it’s closer to the sludge that makes you pull your foot out of your shoe than it is to the Great Pit of Carkoon.
“Anyway, I thought it was important that I get on the record about this.”